Zombie Survival Guide Excerpts

Physical Activities for Zombie Survival Training

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Physical activity is always a good idea. It’s great for health, happiness and zombie survival. If you are thinking about taking up a new sport or activity, may I suggest one that would also improve your chances of surviving the zombie apocalypse?




The following activities, in no particular order, are all great for health and build skills that will aid you in surviving the zombie uprising:

• Baseball
• Soccer
• Boxing
• Any Martial Art
• Tennis
• Swimming
• Canoeing/Kayaking/other boating
• Paintball
• Motocross
• Parkour or Free Running
• Capture the Flag
• Jogging/Running
• Crossfit
• Fencing
• Cycling
• Mountaineering
• Rock Climbing
• Skateboarding
• Roller Derby

*please consult your doctor before beginning any new exercise regimen. We wouldn’t want you dying before the zombies even get here.

Skills you should learn for Zombie Survival

Basic Wilderness Survival skills 

You might want to consider taking a wilderness survival course. Even if you live in an urban environment, these skills will come in handy during the zombie apocalypse. Specific skills include how to build a fire, How to build a shelter, How to Snare Dinner in the Wild (also a good skill to capture and exterminate Zombies) and How to Avoid Hypothermia. Knowing how to kill zombies is useless if you die of starvation or exposure. 

First Aid and Medical skills

It will be a crazy time and people will get hurt. I’m not talking about treating zombie bites here. Those people are doomed. It’s all of the other wounds and injuries that will need treating, so know how to treat them! Everything from cuts, sprains and broken bones, to bullet wounds and third degree burns. Learn how to dress a wound, make a splint, stop bleeding and how to treat a burn. Learn CPR. Once you’ve mastered all of that, you may want to learn some more advanced procedures. Because if you group up with other survivors, it doesn’t matter how much of an asshole you are*, if you can remove a bullet and suture the wound, they will keep you around and keep you safe.

Combat and Self-Defense

There are two types of people you will need to defend yourself from: Dead ones that want to eat you and alive ones that want to take things from you. Or are possibly just jerks. Either way, you’ll want to know how to defend yourself from both types. Consider taking some self-defense classes, or perhaps a martial art or two. Learn how to handle a firearm without blowing off an appendage.

Other skills you may want to consider

Construction - For building a shelter and barricading doors and windows. It would suck to die in your sleep because of a poorly barricaded door.

Welding - Welding can be also be used in barricading and shelter construction. It can also be used to create zombie traps and other such booby-traps. 

Electrical repair - If your group has a means of distance communication (walkie talkies, cb radio, etc), you will want someone around who can fix it if it breaks. You can’t just go out an buy new ones, you know.

Sewing - Again, you can’t just go out and buy new clothes every time something gets worn or rips. There will probably lots to be looted and scavenged in early days, but that wont last forever.


Did I miss anything? What skills do you think will be most important for surviving the zombie apocalypse?

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*Don’t be an asshole. (This is a good life rule in general)

Zombie Survival Kit: Getting prepared

So, you're now thinking about the coming Zombie Apocalypse. Good. Remain vigilant, or whatever. You should now be thinking about putting together a Zombie Survival kit.

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Now, I'm going to tell you something about me. I don't even have a stocked first aid kit, let alone a emergency preparedness kit. In fact, the other day I need a band-aid, and I didn't have any. I used a piece of gauze and scotch tape. Because that's how I roll. So this research I'm doing is as much for me as it is for you.

Lets talk very basic emergency kit and work our way up to our Holy-crap-it's-Zombie-time kit (What? What do you call your kit?).

The easiest way to start your Zombie Survival kit is to just go buy a ready made one. Look, here's some from Amazon:




Sure, you could probably just go buy all of this stuff for much cheaper, but it would more more time consuming and wouldn't come in a convenient package (some of them portable! very important for when you need to leave before the Zombies overrun your home). If you want to put it together yourself, you will need the following things at least: Water (and/or water purification tablets), Food (non-perishable!), Manual can opener (for your non-perishables), Crank flashlight (It would suck to be eaten by Zombies because you're out looting for batteries), crank radio, Extra keys, for house and car, a first aid kit, Cash in small bill and Special needs items - medications, baby formula and diapers, and equipment for people with disabilities.

Next, you'll want to add some or all of the following:

• Change of clothing and footwear for each person
• Sleeping bag or warm blanket for each person
• Pet food and pet medication
• Garbage bags and twist ties
• Multi-tool or basic tools (hammer, wrench, screwdriver, etc.)
• Duct tape
• Plastic sheeting
• Scissors or pocket knife
• Whistle
• Hand sanitizer
• Personal hygiene items
• Important family documents (copies of birth and marriage certificates, passports, licenses, wills, land deeds and insurance) 

Now you are ready for all disasters that are not zombies. Well, I guess you're prepared for the beginning part of the zombie uprising, assuming you've fortified your home. Or live in a fortress. Or a house on stilts. You could hunker down and wait out the initial panic. Of course, this also may not be the best idea, because it gives time for their numbers to grow. Anyway, if there's a hurricane you should be good and prepared.

Ok, lets talk weapons.

Obviously, you're going to need some weapons for zombie survival. First, I want you to remember: Guns are only as good as the person who is using it. Unlike shooting a regular human being, you need to be able to execute a head shot. Every time. Otherwise you'll just waste ammo and probably get yourself and everyone you love killed. This is not as easy as movies make it seem. If you know (no, not think, know) that you can do this, then you probably know way more about guns then I do, so I wont get into guns. You know what you need.

Now, for the rest of us.

Because we've had to rule out projectile weapons, we're going to have to get pretty close to the enemy to attack. For that reason, running is always a better option then fighting when it comes to zombie fights without guns. That being said, always be prepared to fight, just in case.

Here is a quick (kind of awful but very informative) video with some weapons you may want to consider:



You should keeps a few of these with your Zombie Survival kit. I'd also suggest stashing some around the house. You know, crowbar under the kitchen sink, baseball bat under the bed, machete in the bathroom drawer...those sorts of things. (This should go without saying: If you have children, please stash weapons responsibly!) And if you only remember one thing, make it this: as cool as hacking threw zombie brains with a chainsaw looks (totally epic), it's noisy and messy. You'll be alerting all the other zombies in range to your location and you'll probably get zombie blood in your mouth or eye or something. FYI: That would be bad.

That's really all you need in your kit, but there is always room for more.

Other items you may want to consider:

- Dust mask and safety glasses (You know, infected blood splatter and all.)
- Local map
- Compass
- Gas mask (available at army surplus stores and online)
- Ear plugs (for better sleep, and also because all that undead moaning might literally drive you insane)
- Long lasting glow sticks
- Rope
- Tarp (8 x 10 at least)
- Paper towel
- Burlap sacks
- A deck of cards
- A journal or notebook, pens & pencils

Congradulations, you're prepared!

Is there anything that I left out that you'd put in your Zombie Survival Kit?

My Top Five Favorite Books of All Time (To Date)

1. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy Series by Douglas Adams - Ok, so this is technically 5 books, but I own The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, which is all the books in one, so it counts as one. Disagree? Too bad. Make your own list. If you haven’t read Hitchhiker’s Guide, you should go do it. I’m not joking. I have never met someone who’s read it and said that they hated it. Or even that they didn’t like it. I’m sure those people exist, but I’ve never met any of them. If this was a top ten list, there would be at least two other Douglas Adams titles on my list (Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency for sure), but it isn’t, so this trilogy in five parts will have to do.
2. World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War by Max Brooks - In case you didn’t know - I Love Zombies. I love the idea that, Science being what it is, a Zombie Apocalypse could happen. That’s terrifying and incredible. I mean, not incredible if you’re standing in the middle of a Zombie attack....you know, it make sense in my head, but I’ve never been able to explain it to anyone. Anyway, This book has zombies and great story telling. How could you go wrong with that?
3. Divergent by Veronica Roth - Rarely do I finish a book and then want to instantly read it again. I read this book three times in four days. That’s how much I loved it. In fact, I think I might just read it again soon. I can not wait for the next book in this series!  ps: Why not check out my review of Divergent?
4. Here's to You, Rachel Robinson by Judy Blume - I must have read this book a hundred times when I was young. Sadly, I no longer have my copy. I got a bit of a fix reading the “look inside” on Amazon, but that was just a tease. I’ve added it to my wish list, so I’ll remember to buy it in the future. Sadly, it doesn’t come in a kindle version. I only just learned that this is the second book in a series, but I really don’t have any interest in reading the first one.
5. The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead by Max Brooks - Because you gotta be prepared.

What books would you put in your top 5 list?